A powerful pull

Posted: Wednesday, April 18 at 09:23 pm ET by Petra Cahill, MSNBC.com

Bud Kick drove five hours from Gaithersburg, Md., on Wednesday to be with his daughter, Danielle, a 20-year-old sophomore at Virginia Tech. Asked why he waited until two days after Monday’s horrific bloodbath to make the trip, he replied, “She asked me to come.”

The powerful desire to be close to family members in this time of tragedy has brought many parents to the Virginia Tech campus, in some cases simply to pick up devastated students and take them home.

Kick said Danielle initially said she wanted to stay on campus to mourn with her friends and fellow Hokies. But after two days she wanted her dad with her, too.

“I think after the shock and the numbness wore off after the first few days, even us from home … could feel the pain,” said Kick, choking up as he recalled the Tuesday night phone call that put him on the road. “This is a sanctuary for these kids, and it’s changed. I just want to help them through the transition.”

A different sort of familial pull tugged Floridians Chuck and Betty Fontana to the Blacksburg campus.

Chuck, a 1960 graduate who said he arrived on the campus as a 17-year-old fresh from Staten Island, N.Y., and has been “a nut about it” ever since, had to pause to consider when asked what prompted the couple to drive to the campus on Wednesday.

“It’s family,” he said finally.

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102 COMMENTS

please lets stop using this person face over the all the air waves, he is disturbing to look at and its wa waste of time to put his face out their, some times these kinds of people are looking to make a mark in society and we are encouraging it by putting his picture all over the air waves, so please remove his picture but continue to run the stories because they are a good way to understand these disturbe people and it makes us all aware of anyone near us that could have the same issues, thank youa again

Re: The photos and videos. If you don't want to look at it. Don't look at the photo. However, don't thrust your views on other people. Some of us don't like to be ignorant and want the full case study to try to understand this kid and understand what makes people so screwed up in the head. If you don't want to know how the story goes, turn the TV off and enjoy a book. Come back in a week and the story will have died down..

The media just dropped the ball and unfortunately gave some other disturbed individual hope for personal and sick fame. The media destroys all and cares for no one....God help us.

Speak for yourself. I don't want censorship. That means airing everything.. Good or bad.. brutal or beautiful.

@Pj who wrote: "The media destroys all and cares for no one....God help us."

-- You sound as delusional as the killer..

I think it is irresponsible of MSNBC to show that photo of the killer. It is a chilling photo which serves no purpose but to sensationalize the tragedy and get ratings and web hits.

We should focus on the people whose lives have been ended by this tragedy, the young adults full of promise, the Holocaust survivor...and his family who will no doubt be bombarded by every news outlet in the world, blaming them, asking them why they didn't stop him.

Way to go Ronald from NC. Write a meaningful sentence regarding censorship, then call the prior commentator delusional. Can't he write what he wants to? Maybe your the bully that pushes people on the edge to do what they do!

Hey Ronnie,
So you enjoy the video? I ask what's wrong with you?

The media needs to give the facts and not glorify the video.

Think before you post!

PJ

The media is doing their job, besides, everyone wants to know every detail possible. As far as the killer, he did the unthinkable. It's a nightmare what these families are now having to go through with this tragedy.
Not in the killer's defense, but no one knows what he was going through or what his background was to have led him to such atrosity, so we must not judge him. We are no one to judge. That's what the Great Man upstairs is for. What we should concentrate on are the families and friends of the ones killed and offer our prayers and support however possible. That's the most important thing right now. May God be with them all.

I believe PJ means that in its souless quest for profits, the media cares for no other consequences, which is hardly delusional.

As a private detective of twenty eight years and a bipolar individual I would say after MSNBC's own profiler that the recurring, victoriously violent images of Sho are almost certainly going to inspire further copycat horrors.

Society gains exactly nothing from you, Theodore R, understanding this as soon as you can. And those of us who had to understand it for a living never did so by watching television, er, uh, silly person.

As for Mr. Jameston, NBC has already censored half of the material (oh, too bad, Mr. Professional Theodore, busilly comprehending, you don't even have the real forensic materials, just some sensationalized portions best calculated to make NBC money).

Well, I hope the you smug ghouls enjoy yourself.

As a man who's spent way to much of his life dealing with the effects of violence (my last breakdown was preciptiated by my work as a defense investigator) I wish America would grow up and give up its facination with fantasies of heroic gunfighters, and constructive killings.

Oh, and by the way for all of you deep intellectuals out there, the constitution guarantees the people's right to a militia, not a handgun.

Everyone her in Richmond VA is honoring those who lost their lives by wearing VT Orange & Maroon on Friday...Please do the same.

Anyone curious about the family involvment in this kids treatment? He didnt go home for recess, he didnt receive phone calls from home. Why is that? Were they leaving the care of their son to others? There is going to be a lot more to this story in the future. 23 year old college students are not usually just on their own. What has this student been doing for the past five years since graduating from HS. DId this family try to coax their son to come home and go to school locally -- where he could be monitored and cared for by family members. I bet that this family is afraid of him and allowed to school to continue their job of parenting. Yes, 23 year old's often still need the assistance of family members especially their parents. Can't give the family a pass and blame the system for all that they didnt do.


I fond we are quick to examine what the school and police didnt do enough to intervene on this students behalf. Okay, again where was the family.

i have seen more footage of this killer than the victims...apparently he thought he had wrought a mighty work...this guy is a narcissist and clearly insane...it makes me so angry to see his face plastered all over the news, but by the same token, i needed to see his face--to look upon him and realize how insignifigant he really is...

that being said, i wish we could turn our attention back to those who deserve our love and concern...the persons lost were remarkable people, and i am saddened that the world will no longer see the fruits of their gifts, because some self-obsessed lunatic thought he would make a hero out of himself by killing innocent people...

Your coverage of this mass murderer is just what he wanted. I think you should focus on the innocent students and teachers and their families. Personally, this madman should receive no attention for this horrific crime.

My deepest sympathy and prayer go to the beloved families of these deceased people. This recent event is the most disturbing act of evil since Sept. 11.

Let us not let the lives of these 32 young people go in vain. The questions we all have to ask ourselves are simply these: How can we prevent this from happening again? Why is this kind of crime more prevalent in this country, esp in schools?

Importantly, is Gen X really a hedonistic and bratty generation tantamount to that of "Me-First Generation"?

Nonetheless, Cho's actions and cause are woefully misplaced, insane and evil. He should have just ended his life first and spared the rest of the world of his maniacal mind and extreme hatred. This is the only exception for suicide.

I really wish that news could stop covering the insane individual that destroyed so many lives, and focus on the victims. He deserves no news. The victims have given their lives. Please tell the public about the wonderful people these victims were. I beg that you stop focusing on the evil and give time to the good and positive persons taken from us. No good can come of sensationalizing the killer. Speaking of the victims can facilitate healing.... for the families and all of us.

I really wish that news could stop covering the insane individual that destroyed so many lives, and focus on the victims. He deserves no news. The victims have given their lives. Please tell the public about the wonderful people these victims were. I beg that you stop focusing on the evil and give time to the good and positive persons taken from us. No good can come of sensationalizing the killer. Speaking of the victims can facilitate healing.... for the families and all of us.

I think that the media should concentrate on the victims and not give the evil pleasure by showing importance. The video the photos the package he wanted this type of attention after his death. MSNBC, please remove that sick picture as the representation of this tragedy. Instead, place a big photo of the victims in their memory.

I would appreciate if the news services would concentrate on trying to prevent more of these attrocities instead of taking advantage of the public interest the event has created. There is an incredible opportunity at present to educate the troubled youth in our society about how they can search for help. At present, the only message given by the news stories is that it is still uncertain where the blame for the shootings rests. Ultimately, Cho is to blame. Obviously, he had a troubled childhood, but he had other options to solve his problems. His solution was an incredibly cowardly cry for attention, and he used the incredibly predictable media to search for sympathy. The media needs to concentrate on what Cho, the person who pulled the trigger, could have done to find help for his problems. There are many counseling services through schools and private firms that could have helped him, and he should have sought help. Please stop glorifying his actions and attempting to place blame in order to create news stories. This story is definetely news worthy, but the coverage so far has been the most atrocious and immoral attempt at ratings I have ever seen.

Does anyone else out there see that the gunman was in essence trying to get "Revenge of the Nerds" across in his video? Or am I the ony one that makes this connection?

JUST WANT TO SAY I AM IN IRAQ AND I DEEPLY SORRY FOR THE KILLING AND THE FAMILIES WHAT THEY ARE GOING THROUGH I DO NOT KNOW NONE OF THE AMERIAN'S THAT DIED BUT WE ARE VERY SADDEN BY THE EVENTS OF THAT DAY GOD BLESS YOU ALL FROM TAL AFAR , IRAQ

Continue to celebrate the lives of the innocent victims and not the insane maniac that was responsible for this outrage on innocent life. I understand the need and desire of knowing who the killer is and having a face to identify this evil person. However, all we are hearing now is the glorification that he is spewing in these videos. Do not give him what he wanted after the fact; do not show others the glorification of his act.

Please to all media, celebrate the lives of the innocent victims and let us remember THEIR NAMES not this coward murderer's name.


I don't know if anyone else has noticed this, but Cho seems to have an obsession with the play Macbeth. From what I have heard and seen, he wrote a play called McBeef and in his video referenced the play, Macbeth, many times. He even said that now "we" have blood on "our" hands that we will never be able to wash off. I just thought this was interesting and wondered if anyone else noticed this.

The media should be ashamed of itself. They have absolutely prostituted themselves for ratings and have exposed a very painful mourning process for the sake of tabloid journalism.

I am so glad there is finally a discussion on the need to stop the insanity regarding the PR media are so consistently providing for these various insane, clearly sick individuals...Stop creating a soap opera from these tragic events...How do you think family members of the victims feels when they see that murderer's face all over the Internet!!?? Somebody sais censorship!!Wake up!! Who cares about their messages and "manifestos"!! if that's the price..It is sickening to my stomach...they will do anything to get their "message" accross and media are playing right into it...The only news on a murderer of any kind should be "done by an individual, 34 years old..." no pictures, names, nothing to make them important and famous...you can study the "cases" all you want, just please stop making superstars of them...What has this psycho done in his life to deserve his face being posted for the whole planet to see it!!!??as Internet has that power, as well as the rest of the media..TV, newspapers...This "celebrity driven culture" with all its deviances is deeply imoral, tasteless and disgusting and has to stop once and for all.

People need to see the coverage of this tragic event in order to understand that no matter how hard we try our children , parents, and all our loved ones can be taken from us at anytime. May God be with all the familes that lost there loved ones.
My thoughts and prayers are with you all.
D.Y. Chambersburg,PA

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As officials, students and families struggle to come to terms with the tragedy at Virginia Tech, a team of MSNBC.com reporters and editors and NBC News producers and correspondents is on the scene.