No jokes allowed
"So Muqtada al-Sadr goes to Japan…" the barber tells his customer who was already smiling, bracing himself in the chair for a laugh. The barber tells the best jokes in Baghdad.
"So Muqtada is in Tokyo and meeting with officials and all of the top Japanese people and it’s a very big deal," the barber continues, as the customer’s hair falls on the floor in tufts.
"So Muqtada asks for a meeting, you know with who? No, you don’t know," he says. "It wasn’t with Japanese arms merchants or the army, but with the Toyota company. Do you know why?
"No," says the customer, ready for the big punch line.
"Because he wanted them to make the trunks of their cars bigger."
Like a good comedian, the barber laughs, enticing the customer to laugh even harder.
Toyotas are very common in Baghdad, and especially popular with Muqtada al-Sadr’s Mahdi Army. They often stuff bodies in the trunks.
No laughing matter
But another customer in the barbershop didn’t laugh. He was quietly having a haircut in another chair. He was one of those Mahdi Army men who kills people and stuffs them in the trunks of Toyotas.
The next day he went to visit the barbers and his customers to discuss their "inappropriate humor."
The conversations went like this:
The Mahdi army fighter tied the barber up, took a knife and plucked out both of his eyes. He was only left alive because he was Shiite, like the Mahdi Army.
The customer who laughed at the joke, a Sunni, was killed and stuffed in the trunk of a car, although the friend of the barber who told me the story this morning didn’t know if the car was a Toyota.
[In response to the first comment below, Richard added this:
"Yes…you are right, it does very much sound like an 'urban legend.' The source, however, is a long trusted friend of mine who is a personal friend of the barber. My friend didn’t just hear about the incident, but has visited the barber in his home after he was attacked and seen his condition. The barber, who lives with his parents, hardly ever goes outside anymore.
"And 'were things better under Saddam?' When asked this question this week, two Iraqis told me, 'Before there were massacres but they were secret, now they take place openly.'"]
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Slide Show
- Life beyond the violence
Suicide attacks and murders due to sectarian conflict continue around Iraq. See how residents live their lives amid the attacks.




Baghdad Bob writes back
I do not belive this tale. It sounds too fake to be even considered. What did the fighter replace the Barbasol in the shop with Jerry Curl too. Come on.
Lets just say that it is true, for one second. Why should we care? Who cares if the Iraquis are killing one another, really. No one cares that in Africa, there are murders every day cutting off peoples hands, and arms and these stories are verified. No one cares that the Serbs are getting killed in Kosovo by the Albanians, while NATO stands around and watches.
I say let the Iraquis kill each other, get our guys out of harms way and if it creates a hole in the middle east, so what, we fund Isreal enough to hands the shabby armies of all of the other nations.
Jeffree Dominick (Sent Oct 12, 2006 12:58:00 PM)
I agree with Grant, we must leave Iraq let them kill each other -- let God, ur, Allah sort it out.
Librl Al-Franqin, Old York, NY (Sent Oct 12, 2006 12:59:56 PM)
We call them barbaric..(yes, some are)
Yet we sat and cheered on "Shock & Awe" knowing full well innocents were also dying.
Oh well, humans are humans and will keep on killing each other, in the name of religion, race, you name it, we'll come up with an excuse to kill...The commies will turn into the Islamists...Let's see what's next...
Just my .02!
SJ Florida (Sent Oct 12, 2006 1:03:20 PM)
The hatred is so engrained into their genes that nothing we do can reverse it. We should let them fight it out amongst themselves and than deal with the outcome.
Richard Formica, Brookline NH (Sent Oct 12, 2006 1:08:11 PM)
Mr. Engel Hello: This an open comment - what you and other reporters in the Middle East do not understand is that the U.S. did not go to Iraq to win the the "war on terror " or make peace - they went to destablize the region.
Carmen D. Rivera Brooklyn New York (Sent Oct 12, 2006 1:10:30 PM)
i guess this site really is full of liberals. we can't just talk about things. actions speak louder than words. maybe some of these countries have the right idea. punishment for your actions. although some is extreme. you have very litle problem with most in there society. look at asia. no gum, spitting on the streets. and it works and it's clean. now look here litter, grafitti, spit, gum , cigarettes and god knows what else. get the picture. we talked to japan and they envoked war, we talk with the terrorist (all of em) over the years, they attacked us, we were extorted by the north koreans before so they wouldn't have nukes and guess what they want more. we killed more soldiers withou going to war under the clintons than any other president. these people cannot be talk to. they are neanderthols. actions speak louder than words people. so get of your soap boxes and do something. besides hide behind a democrat.
bugman (Sent Oct 12, 2006 1:11:00 PM)
True or not ... this is a sad commentary on the state of affairs in Iraq today, not to mention a US casualty rate that is currently triple what it was a year ago.
Since it does not appear that we are leaving Iraq anytime soon, let's keep our men and women in uniform in our thoughts and prayers.
Lee Rudnicki, Los Angeles, CA (Sent Oct 12, 2006 1:12:02 PM)
Does anyone out there truly think this is going to get better the longer US troops are there? We are just delaying the inevitable; Iraq and the rest of the Middle East have to determine their own destiny.
Bryan, USA (Sent Oct 12, 2006 1:15:15 PM)
Here is something Liberals just don’t get: Sure, terrorists are flocking to Iraq like moths to a flame - THAT’S A GOOD THING YOU STUPID SLUGS! If these gutless wonders weren’t being kept busy in Iraq by the U.S. Military, they would be keeping innocent Americans busy over here, if you catch my drift. You anti-war Liberals are so ignorant, I honestly don’t know how you remember to breath.
Tyler - Montgomery, TX (Sent Oct 12, 2006 1:15:19 PM)
It doesnt really matter if this is true or not. There is a lesson to be learned here. Stories like this do happen, as well as, civil fighting in the streets, car bombs, genocide, and every other immoral act you can think of. The biggest problem is, its been happening for hundreds, probably thousands of years. Now, thanks to our President, its happening to our men and women of this great nation.
Matt, Mt.Juliet, TN (Sent Oct 12, 2006 1:17:21 PM)
Frank, well put regarding the Amish. It would be a much better world if we could all forgive. Unfortunately that is not how it is... Muslim fanatics will most likely always want to destroy America and the things that it stands for. Their hatred of us is unreasoning, as evidenced by them willing to strap on a bomb and go kill.
I do not know why the "moderate" Muslims do nothing. I have heard that Islam is a religion of peace. I find it hard to believe that among all the millions of Muslims in the world, there is this small group that is giving them all a bad name and the larger group is unwilling/unable to do anthing about it.
niels, benson, mn (Sent Oct 12, 2006 1:20:23 PM)
Why dont you spend your time investigating whether or not all this killing by terrorist-at-night/policemen-at-day is part of the "Salvador Option" that was rumored to be initiated by the US military some time ago.
james doe, Canada (Sent Oct 12, 2006 1:26:55 PM)
This joke, IF IT WAS EVER TOLD TO BEGIN WITH, and the subsequent "reactions" (i.e. gouging out of barber's eyes and the killing of the one customer) would NEVER have occurred if we never invaded this country in the first place. I thought that the main focus with this "War on Terror" campaign was the country of Afghanistan. After all, THIS country openly welcomed Osama Bin Laden (remember him?) and his Al-Qaeda co-horts into their country. Not to mention the terrorist training camps that he setup throughout it. Hmmmm....wonder what happened since then? SOMEONE lost their focus and decided to invade another country with NO ties to Al-Qaeda and OBL. He may have killed his own people, which is detesteable but let's face FACTS...Saddam posed NO danger to OUR country. Afghanistan WAS the key on this "War on Terror" but it is now playing "second fiddle"...and what is happening? A resurgance by, guess who? The Taliban and...yep, you guessed right...Al-Qaeda. Oh and i AM a registered REPUBLICAN, so don't start mouthing off with some nonsense about "Liberal leanings".
Kris Gallagher, Philadelphia, Pa. (Sent Oct 12, 2006 1:28:40 PM)
I don't understand why so many posters are attacking the credibility of Richard's story. If the story as related is indeed true, of course the sources and victims involved would not want to be identified in the media - what do you think would happen to them then? If the story is exaggerated, is it not in the realm of possibility that events like these are taking place regularly in Iraq? To me the story illustrates the sad truth that no matter how long GW Bush keeps US troops in Iraq, they will not be able to "fix" the brutal civil conflict that is carrying on there.
Doc Walker, Washington, DC (Sent Oct 12, 2006 1:29:24 PM)
What a completely useless waste of space. Nice of you to fan the flames of ignorant hatred. That's what this country really needs: more black and white thinking. More reinforcement of the old "Us and Them" attitude. Us being pure and virginal, them being just plain evil. That level of understanding has really worked out for us so well.
Rob, Missoula, MT (Sent Oct 12, 2006 1:31:25 PM)
Let’s just say Iraq invaded US and installed new regime. How would we react to it, wouldn’t we fight for our way or welcome invaders, how would we treat those cooperating with invaders? Will we be willing to die for our values? Why are we expecting anyone else react any differently? In California my Armenian friend was attacked just because he looked Middle Eastern how much we are really different.
tk (Sent Oct 12, 2006 1:33:18 PM)
I am always amused at the supposed polarization of science and religion. I think its called a bell curve.
People are eager to fight for something. Their nation, religion, secular belief, house in the hamptons whatever. Its a question of pressure.
middleamerica (Sent Oct 12, 2006 1:34:58 PM)
I second it Grant and Librl - Let Packistan, Jordan, Saudi Arabia, Egypt lend a hand for Peace in the region. Of course they won't!! They don't care, b/c their people don't care. All those Arab nations bordering Israel - not one of them ever offered land for the Palestinians to live on, not one of them gives humanitarian aide. In America - at least we fight back against our religious zealots, and try to keep them from office. We don't always win - but we try. And even George Bush or Ronald Reagan, could not just decide to stay in office after their term. The Constitution of the US (What's left of it) is deeply rooted in the conviction that Democracy can solve Democracy's ills. There is no Democracy in the Middle East, except for Israel. That includes Iraq and Afghanistan - Take a look at their "constitutions" - essentially they allow for villages to determine what laws to follow, including stoning insubordinate wives and children - This is the reality - we are not wanted in Iraq - or Afghanistan - where by the way,5 years later, women and girls do not attend schools or play soccer - unless they are behind the walss and in the protective custody of the US army -because otherwise they would be be-headed.
David, Long Island (Sent Oct 12, 2006 1:35:18 PM)
Are we still calling this endeavor Operation Iraqi Freedom?
It's been awhile since OIF was tossed around as the trendy rationale, and perhaps they need to invent a new 'operation' moniker. Operation No Jokes Or Else?
Greg S (Sent Oct 12, 2006 1:42:44 PM)
David, we DID set up a puppet strongman, Saddam Hussien. If you will recall, during the Iran-Iraq war, the U.S. provided him with much of the weapons and technology he later used against his own people. All this to "balance" the power in the middle east and prevent the Islamic extremists in Iran from gaining the upper hand in the region.
Bill - Knoxville, TN (Sent Oct 12, 2006 1:48:26 PM)
I am not a pessimist but I am not optimistic about the situation in Iraq or the Middle East for that matter. You have minority vigilante/extremist groups and corrupt governments some supported by the USA eg. Saudi Arabia and each wield inordinate amount of power on the masses often the latter in opposition to the former (currption) and the former is often powerless to do anything about the former. If we westerners decide to not purchase gas for a week do you think we could have an impact on currupt regimes? We do not live in a bubble as some would have others think, so thier problem is our problem as is evident. Now let us have consistent policy. I hold you accountable and you hold the next guy accountable.
JeMarie (Sent Oct 12, 2006 1:48:40 PM)
Things like that happen in our own country as well. How sad a state is a place where you can't even tell a joke. The joke is meant as a way for the scared civilians to detatch from the EVIL that these people use to put fear into everyday civilians. It is pathetic that we go in and eliminate a tyrant, and all that some of those people can think about is the "evil west" and petty wars within their own religion.
Matthew Hessler (Sent Oct 12, 2006 1:50:59 PM)
It doesn't matter if the story is true or not. It seems funny that all you self-righteous people criticize Muslims for not apologizing for a handful of terrorists who call themselves Muslims. The terrorists represent Islam as much as the BTK killer represents Christians (who will be in heaven as I am told by my Christian friend because he believes Jesus Christ is his lord and saviour).
Isn't it nice that you can make somebody's life miserable and oppress them by supporting tyrants (i.e. Saddam, Saudi royal family, Hosni Mubarak) then waging war and now washing your hands of it. Let's see you blog and criticize when there are a couple of death squads in your neighborhood.
A. Khan (Sent Oct 12, 2006 1:53:04 PM)
THE SITUATION IN IRAQ WILL NOT GET BETTER UNTIL THE U.S.MILITARY IS GIVEN PERMISSION TO COMPLETELY DESTROY ALL OF THE INSURGENTS AND THEIR FAMILIES IN IRAQ.THE ONLY WAY TO GET RID OF EVIL IS TO DESTROY IT AND ALL OF IT'S SEEDS.THIS WILL MEAN WE WILL HAVE TO BE VERY UN-POLITCALLY CORRECT,WHICH WILL PROBABLY NEVER HAPPEN HERE IN AMERICA NOW.YOU CANNOT REASON WITH EVIL,EVER.THE U.S. MILITARY NEEDS TO QUIT BEING A POLICE FORCE AND START BEING THE WARRIORS THAT THEY ARE TRAINED TO BE AND TAKE CARE OF BUSINESS IN IRAQ BECAUSE THIS SITUATION HAS TURNED INTO ANOTHER VIETNAM.
RICHARD (Sent Oct 12, 2006 2:01:13 PM)
When is the rest of the world going to realize that all people know in that part of the world is violence and killing? They were born into it, and then raised with their mentality beat into their own minds. We cannot change an entire country's way of thinking. There has always been violence in the Middle East, and there always will be. Yes, we would love to change that, for the sake of the children and helpless. But reality is, we just can't. Leave them all alone, and let them continue to destroy themselves. We need to worry about our own country's violence, drugs, homeless, etc...
Chris Lee (Sent Oct 12, 2006 2:12:07 PM)
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